MSP and Somaly Mam: On the Forefront
My Sisters Place will have the distinct pleasure of honoring Somaly Mam, human trafficking survivor and tireless activist and advocate, at this years Spring Benefit “Near and Far…Voice’s For Change”, on March 11, 2010.
Like Somaly Mam, MSP is dedicated to addressing the critical needs of human trafficking victims, and is committed to eradicating this heinous crime in all of it’s forms.
My Sisters’ Place was recently chosen by the New York State Office of Temporary and Disability Assistance (OTDA) to be the human trafficking services provider for the Lower Hudson Valley region of New York State. This region includes Westchester, Rockland, Orange, Putnam, Dutchess, Ulster, and Sullivan counties.
For over five years, MSP has been serving approximately 2-3 trafficking victims per year. Those that have been receiving services have been from countries such as Senegal, Sudan, Bangladesh, Ecuador, Guatemala, and Peru, as well as other regions in Central and South America. We have taken a holistic approach to our work with human trafficking survivors, and have assisted each one via the host of services that we offer; including legal and counseling services, MSP’s Life Skills Program, and our emergency shelters.
Honoring the work of Somaly Mam gives MSP the opportunity to partner with a powerful voice in the movement to end human trafficking, and to bring the anti-trafficking work that we are doing here in Westchester County to the forefront.
MSP’s 2010 Spring Benefit “Near and Far…Voices for Change”
My Sisters’ Place will hold its annual Spring Benefit on March 11th, 2010, at the Ritz Carlton Westchester in White Plains, NY. This year, MSP’s Spring Benefit “Near and Far…Voice’s For Change” will honor the anti-trafficking work of Somaly Mam, a human trafficking survivor and tireless activist and advocate.
Born to a tribal minority family in the Mondulkiri province ofCambodia, Somaly Mam began life in extreme poverty. With limited options as a member of a severely marginalized ethnic group, and living in unimaginable despair, her family often resorted to desperate means to survive. This confluence of dire circumstances led to the unspeakable horrors that would mark Somaly’s early years. Somaly was sold into sexual slavery by a man who posed as her grandfather.
Somaly heroically escaped her captors and set about building a newlife for herself. She vowed never to forget those left behind and hassince dedicated her life to saving victims and empowering survivors.
Somaly has justifiably garnered world-wide respect and is now a renowned leader at the forefront of theanti-trafficking struggle. Universally recognized as a visionary for her courage, dignity, ingenuity, and resilience, Somaly was honored asone of Time Magazine‘s 100 Most Influential People of 2009 and wasrecently featured as a CNN Hero.
We are thrilled to be able to honor Somaly Mam at this year’s event, and to incorporate her powerful voice into our own work to provide hope and achieve justice for victims and survivors of human trafficking and domestic violence.
February is Body Image Awareness Month
Body image is how we perceive our bodies, and ultimately how we perceive ourselves. It is the way that we think we look, and how we feel about it. It is not only what we see in the mirror, but what we think others see when they look at us. Body image is not just about body size; it includes our whole appearance: how we move; how our voices sound; the way we stand; the way we laugh, and our smiles. When we think of the words “body image” we often think of women and girls, but body image effects men and boys as well.
When a person has a healthy body image, they have a real perception of their shape and size and are comfortable with their body. Sure, some may feel there are a few areas for improvement; for health or other reasons, but generally they are satisfied with the way they look, and, overall, they value themselves.
With a negative body image, a person has a distorted perception of their shape and size, constantly compares their body to others, and feels shame and anxiety about their body.
Being unhappy with your body can affect how you think and feel about yourself as a person. A poor body image can lead to emotional distress, low self-esteem, unhealthy dieting habits, anxiety, depression, and eating disorders.
Developing a positive body image is crucial to a person’s sense of happiness and overall wellness. Here are some tips for keeping a mindful attitude towards body image and developing a healthier sense of self.
- Accept your body’s natural course, and your genetics. In the short-term, you may be able to force your body into sizes and shapes that you prefer, but you can’t beat Mother Nature.
- Try to avoid all of the the fad diets and weigh loss scams. When you’re hungry, satisfy hunger completely with plenty of whole, nutrient rich foods.
- Limit your sedentary entertainment. Sure movies and snacks are fun but when possible, get out there and move on a regular basis. Take walks, practice yoga, dance…movement increases blood flow and boosts the levels of serotonin in your body – which makes you feel a sense of well-being.
- Choose role models that reflect a realistic standard of beauty/attractiveness.
- Stay human! In spite of all the ads that we see that scream “image is everything.” REMEMBER that how you look is only one part of who you are. Develop a sense of identity based on all the things you do well, the values you whole heartedly believe in, and the person that you are deep inside.
The Principle of Love
“At the center of non-violence stands the principle of love.”
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Every year, with the passing of MLK Day, media campaigns, news shows, and radio stations present us with a flurry of quotes and memorable sound bites exalting the work and activism of the late Martin Luther King, Jr.
This year, as I sat home on my day off, perusing the internet for special events honoring MLK, I came across the quote printed above. This quote immediately reminded me something one of my clients say shared about her experience going into one of My Sisters’ Place’s emergency shelters. She said “I showed up with all of my possessions in two black garbage bags, and my daughter on my hip. When I walked through the front door, I just started to cry…I knew I was home. I was greeted at the door with a warm smile and a big loving hug, and the rest is history.”
When my client shared these words with me, I was deeply moved. I felt honored to be a part of an organization that provides a nurturing lifeline of love and to women and children whose lives have been uprooted by domestic violence. I truly believe that MSP embodies the spirit of non-violence, activism, and love, that Martin Luther King, Jr. was committed to creating in the world.
Life Skills Graduation Ceremony
On December 17th, over 40 staff and supporters gathered at a local church hall in Yonkers to celebrate the success of the 5 amazing women who successfully completed the Fall cycle of Life Skills Program at MSP.
The graduation ceremony was a moving and inspiring testament to the critical work that MSP does. It was also a testament to the resolve and dedication of each of the participants. Amidst tears of joy and laughter, the graduates each took to the podium to say a few words about how much the Life Skills Program had changed their outlook on life, and helped them to heal from the abuse that they suffered. Each of the women took the opportunity to thank the agency for helping them to realize their true potential and move forward with their aspirations for a life free from abuse and full of self-sufficiency.
Fall Cycle Comes to a Close
This will mark our last week of classes for the Fall 2009 cycle of the Life Skills Program. Next Thursday, five amazing women will celebrate their tremendous success, and will graduate from the program. The last 11 weeks have been a truly educational and therapeutic experience for the participants. The women have worked diligently to create resumes, learn new computer programs, and work on effective communication. But perhaps their greatest success has been their ability to connect to one another, to let their guard down, to share openly about their past experiences, and to begin to heal from the abuse that they have suffered.
The last week of classes always creates a buzz of both excitement, and sadness, as the women prepare to move forward from the insulation of the Life Skills Program, and out into the “real” world. While the women blast out resumes to potential employers, or apply for enrollment in college courses, there’s a marked look of uncertainty in their eyes, as they think about what the future will hold.
At MSP, we are dedicated to maintaining relationships with the graduates, and offering follow-up and supportive services as they navigate through the uncertain waters of achieving full economic self-sufficiency. We look forward to watching each of the graduates take the stage, and commend them on a job well done!
Gratitude to Verizon and Wachovia
With the onset of the recession, and the economic trouble that so many non-profit organizations are facing today, I always worry about the future of the Life Skills Program. My concerns extend beyond worrying about job security – and into worrying about client “security”. The Life Skills Program changes women’s lives. It provides a lifeline of empowerment for our clients, as they struggle to create a life of economic self-sufficiency for themselves and their families. In times like these, the thought that Life Skills could have to shut its doors is a frightening one, and something we at MSP work diligently to prevent.
This week, I am overcome with gratitude. My Sisters’ Place has just been awarded over $17,000 in grants to support the Life Skills Program. Wachovia Bank has generously given $10,000 to the program to support the financial literacy of our participants. Additionally, Verizon has awarded us a grant in the amount of $7,200 to help us continue to provide our participants with the job readiness and hard skills training that they need.
Thanksgiving may be over, but our gratitude shines on.
Eating Smarter
One of the workshops we are happy to be able to offer to our clients is a Nutrition, Food Budgeting & Fitness series offered by the Cornell Cooperative Extension. CCE has been facilitating workshops at The Life Skills Program for over 5 years. They present a fantastic program to our clients about nutrition, the importance of exercise, menu planning, food budgeting and food safety. The Eat Smart NY Program is perhaps one of the most helpful and impactful segments of our curriculum. This program helps our clients to become self sufficient when it comes to making choices about food and creating family food budgets.
Here at the agency, we see the change in our clients who have participated in the Eat Smart Program. Our clients think differently about food, they select healthier options when it comes to cooking for themselves and their children, and they make lasting lifestyle changes that will improve their overall health. They carefully plan their weekly menus, and collect recipes from magazines and the internet. They use coupons and research grocery store sale circulars before heading to the market. And above all else, they begin to take a real interest in exercise and fitness as a means to lead a healthier life.
The Eat Smart New York Program is an important part of the success of the Life Skills Program. We are grateful for their dedication and commitment to keeping our clients educated and healthy.
The “Do’s” of Interviewing
Today we had several volunteers from the Volunteer Center of the United Way come into Life Skills to perform an “interview” role play skit for our participants. The skit acts out all the “do’s” and “don’ts” for job interviewing. Not only is the skit hilarious, it is also a great tool for helping the participants get ready for their own job interviews.
For the last five years, retired executives and professionals, all volunteers of the United Way, have partnered with the Life Skills program to provide job readiness training and support for our clients. Each cycle they lead two workshops for our clients. The interview role play is the first workshop they facilitate, followed by a workshop entitled “mock interview”.
During the “mock interview” workshop, volunteers are paired with clients and perform real interviews. Each of the women are given the opportunity to interview with three different volunteers, to get a sense of the diversity of interview styles that they may encounter in the job market. After each interview is performed, the volunteers evaluate and discuss the success of the interview, and give the participants suggestions as to how they can become stronger interviewees.
Hats off to the Volunteer Center at the United Way for their dedication and continued support!
Sisters
This week marked the half way point of the Fall cycle of the Life Skills program. In just six short weeks, we will hold our graduation ceremony, and the work of the participants will be celebrated. They will move on into jobs, college courses, ESL classes, or additional vocational training programs.
Yesterday we met for lunch with our Job Readiness facilitator, to talk about the coming weeks, and to share our “Vision Board” art project with each other. As the women presented their “visions” for their future, there were many common threads that ran through each of the boards. Specifically the women envisioned; stable and safe homes for themselves and their children, successful careers, and intimate relationships built on trust, respect and love.
It was powerful to hear each woman talk about what it was she wanted for her future, and how she planned on attaining her goals. The women’s presentations were woven with stories from their past, detailing their personal struggles, the violence that they experienced, and the adversity that they had to overcome. By the end of the presentation, there wasn’t a dry eye in the room. But amidst all of the tears, there was also hope and determination, and a deep sense of unity among the participants…a true feeling of sisterhood.
And Then There Were 8
The Life Skills Program has an attrition rate of approximately 30% per cycle. We always begin each cycle with as many recruits as we can, knowing that by the fourth or fifth week, we will lose a few participants. The reasons for attrition include; moving from an MSP shelter to a new city or town, taking on a job, returning to school full time, or not being able to make a commitment to the program. While attrition is something that we have come to expect, it never gets any easier to say goodbye.
This week marked the sixth week of our Fall cycle, and sadly, three participants have moved on to other opportunities. We began this cycle with 11 women in total, and in the last few weeks, 3 of these amazing women have left the program. Two women received housing vouchers, and moved to locations that make it nearly impossible to access the Life Skills program site, and one of the ladies has found a part time job, and received a scholarship to attend college. She will begin her coursework at the end of November.
As the Program Coordinator, I am proud of the strides that these three women are making to recreate their lives, and live free from abuse. While I am sad to see them go, I feel that receiving housing, a part time job, and a scholarship, are amazing milestones of success for these women, and I wish them all the best. Fortunately, these women have made a deep connection to the staff at MSP, and I am sure that they will continue to receive supportive services through the agency, and regularly check in and update us on their success!
Rolling out our Mentoring Program
After several months of planning, recruiting and training volunteers, today marked the roll out of the Life Skills Mentoring Program. The mentoring program was designed to connect local volunteers with Life Skills clients in need of professional mentors. The focus of the mentoring program is to provide the participants of Life Skills with a mentor who will give support and guidance as they graduate from the program, and transition into the workforce.
This afternoon, Board Member and Mentoring Program Facilitator, Eileen Farbman, led an info session for the Life Skills participants to discuss the parameters and opportunities of the mentoring program. Eileen has done an amazing job of rallying, recruiting, and coordinating trainings for the future mentors.
The ladies were thrilled with the idea of being matched with a mentor. Re-entry into the workforce, especially in today’s economy, can be a very daunting task.. The women are looking forward to having someone they can count on to support them as they go through the process of looking for, interviewing, and landing a new job.
Visions for the Future
We started an interesting art project yesterday in Life Skills. The facilitator who teaches our resume writing workshop asked that each of the participants create a “vision board” for their future. Modeled after something she saw on the Oprah Winfrey show, the “vision board” project uses collage as a means to recognize the full potential of your future, and to bring about change in your life.
Amongst a pile of foam boards, glue sticks, glitter, magazines, and metallic adhesive letters, each woman set out to create a board representative of her vision for the future. The participants cut out pictures of families, houses, and vacation destinations. They also cut out phrases such as “live your best life now”, and “peace comes from within”. They pasted their hopes for the future to the foam boards, piece by piece.
As the women began to collage with the images and phrases they had cut out, their spirits rose. They started to help each other in creating their collages. One woman shouted “I need a picture of Africa if anyone finds one”, and another “I need a photo of a woman lying in a hammock”.
As each week passes, and with each new workshop and learning experience, I see the participants change more and more. Life Skills is tapping into their strengths, skills and creativity. The group is finding solidarity, and they are beginning to heal from the trauma of their past.
New Possibilities
Today in Life Skills we had our first of three workshops led by the Women’s Enterprise Development Center of Westchester. The WEDC offers the Life Skills program workshops in entrepreneurship training, helping the participants to realize their full potential in today’s small business economy. Today’s training focused specifically on starting a home based business, and it was quite eye opening and encouraging for the ladies.
As the facilitator went around the room asking each woman to identify her strengths, talents, and hobbies, I could see everyone’s mental gears begin to turn. Ideas began to flow, as women talked about their skills and talents in things like baking, promoting special events, providing childcare, and making jewelry.
By the end of the two hour session, the participants were thoroughly inspired. They spent their lunch hour writing down ideas, and creating names for their future business. Through this workshop, and the dynamism of the facilitator, the women were able to see new possibilities for their future, and their economic independence.
Small Triumphs
The Life Skills Program has been in session for two week so far. The group has started to “gel”, and the 9 participants are slowly allowing their walls to come down. Because of the trauma that many of the women have experienced, it is not always easy for them to connect with other women, and to share their experience, strength and hope with one another.
The women are beginning to build trust, and they are starting to connect as friends, rather than as program attendees. Yesterday was a very special testament to the connection of the group. Unbeknownst to me, the ladies had planned to bring family photos to share with one another at lunchtime. Our lunch hour became a very moving “show and tell”, as the women passed photos of their friends and loved ones around for all to see. They shared their photos with pride, talking about their children, their relatives, and the friends that have helped carry them through the abuse that they suffered.
I left our lunch break overcome with gratitude. I feel blessed to be a part of such an amazing program, and an amazing organization. My Sisters’ Place truly is a lifeline for so many.
